Friday, November 18, 2011

I Realized Tonight

When something seems wrong and you feel down, look up and talk to the One Up There. Maybe there's a space in your heart devoid of Him. There's a space in it that only Jesus can fill in. 

And if it's not filled as it should be, everything else becomes a vacuum.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Music on a Rainy Tuesday Morning

Sarah Mclachlan's Angel.

In the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort here.

Happy Birthday, Buddy! :)

To you who have been with me through searching,
Brought me to laughing,
Stayed with me though I'm frowning,
Pushed me to hoping, dreaming.

Happiest birthday to you, small man, who's got a big big space in my heart.

Continue doing good,
Always making people happy by your deed and positive mood,
Blessing other people's lives,
And keeping up your good vibes.

May your hopes, dreams, aspirations, 
All come true
As you enter another year
Here's a blissful cheer
Just for you.

You got me on your side.
With all the love, support, I abide,
With all that you are, my heart is in pride.


Monday, November 14, 2011

Should Be This

Credits to: This Tumblr site.

Thoughts on a Monday

I just finished writing my 10.30 a.m. assignment for our mock updates at work. The script is now being checked by one of our executive producers. Honestly, I think I did not do well. 

I feel a negative energy galloping around me like a hurricane lashing a town. Oh, the downside of un-praying and un-connecting to the Heavens. Jesus, I seek for your deliverance.

Browsing through my favorite author Paulo Coelho's site , I found these e-cards. Positive thoughts to counter the storm over my ocean.

This week is going to be a blast! 

Thursday, November 10, 2011

God in the Middle

The one thing we all can control though is how we respond to being in the middle. When God seems distant, we can choose to have faith that He’s walking with us. When pain becomes suffocating, we can decide to reach out and share what’s happening with someone. When everything seems grim and never-ending, we can choose to delight in a quiet moment, a deep breath ... maybe a chocolate cookie. And when our hearts still can’t let go of wanting that certain outcome, we can choose to realize that no matter what happens we are of immense worth to God and to those who love us. Despite how things might turn out.

We’re all together in the middle and God is there too. Even if things are not fine, somehow they are.

- When Life Doesn't Go as Planned

True Love Waits, Indeed

Four years ago, I was just a guy who had a crush on a girl, who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do, which was just to… wait…And, a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl I work with but I think, even then I knew that… I was waiting for my wife. 
-Jim Halpert

If Only I Can

Today, I want to run to a place where there is absolute silence. Where I can hear nothing than the hush of the breeze, the falling autumn leaves, and the humming of the birds. Where I can feel the embrace of the sky amid a thick, cold fog, and take in the freshest air on earth. Where I can smell the pure, undefiled scent of the flowers and witness the magnificence of their differing colors, hues, and textures. Where I can just lie down on a bed of green, fresh grasses, and feel the hearth beneath me. Or where I can simply find refuge from a sturdy tree and sit on its bark as I write down the words that seem to flow like the water on a river.

There are days when you want to escape the world you are in and find peace and serenity in a seemingly superficial yet real place. 

Today, I want to keep silent, be still, and pray with all my might.

If only I can.

Monday, October 17, 2011

When I Opened My Hands and Prayed

There was a bright light in the middle of a black, dark space. A voice said, “Imagine Him looking at your eyes, He isn’t telling anything; He was looking just straightly at you.” Suddenly, a familiar face emerged in front of me. It was Jesus.

This was the encounter I did not expect today – even for the retreat where I opted to spend my weekend with. I have been from several retreats when I was still studying, but never had an encounter with my Lover and Number One Fan as powerful as this. 
It happened when I opened my hands and prayed.

“He embraces you. He touches your hair. You feel the rhythm of His heart. You listen to Him speak right in front of your ears.” I experienced the love of Jesus and felt his embrace as clearly as Ate Mara uttered these phrases. I talked to Him, asked Him several things, bargained with Him, made a deal with Him, and uttered a vow to Him. This lasted for minutes, and the sound of worship praises playing in the background made my encounter with Jesus even sweeter.

I sobbed uncontrollably, dampening the band of tissue on my hands. Well, He knew everything about me. My life goes naked in His eyes. He knew me from the top of my head to the sole of my feet, and I couldn’t hide anything from Him. He knows my weaknesses, my insecurities, my guilty pleasures, my failures, my unfinished businesses, my broken promises, my unfulfilled covenants, my mistakes and mishaps. Above all, He knows my sins. He knows my bondages. DESPITE THESE, He opened His arms to me. He embraced me. He loved me. He allowed me to feel the rhythm of His Heart, and he fine-tuned my heartbeat to His in order to calm me and tell me, “Sssshhh. I love you.”

It amazed me how He gave me answers promptly and simply to questions on career, family, and love, among other things. There were Yeses, Nos, and It’s Up to You. I wished I had a RAM in my head that could record and store our conversation verbatim, but I only had a limited storage capacity in my brain. Yet again, even though I could not remember the exact words He had uttered, I could vividly remember how He made me feel during that moment. I was forgiven, I was set free, I was loved. How priceless.

All the more I felt his embrace when Ate Lissy prayed over me. This was the time I cried – really cried, in all the sense of the word – neither because I was in pain nor I was hurt, but because I was set free. The mercy and goodness of Jesus Christ was simply overwhelming you couldn’t contain it in silence. You really had to let it out.

I can now say I am growing up, but never growing old. Age is just a number that tells how long we have lived our life on Earth, but it doesn’t measure the love of our Jesus Christ that sustains us everyday while we are alive. I believe we are made not to count years, but to count how we have loved ourselves, others, and God. Most importantly, God knows no age for people who want to seek Him and want to find Him. I believe people whose hearts are open for genuine love and service always remain young and fresh. I know many of them; some of them are even amongst God-sent angels to me.

I pray that I sustain this and cling onto my promises as Jesus reveals His plans to me everyday of my life. Just as even for the times I have questioned, for the times I have doubted, for the times I have broken vows, I have felt His Love. As it has been said, “Where sin abounds, Grace abounds even more.” I have received that grace, as sinful as I am… as unworthy as I am.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Glad to be back

It has been barely half a year since I posted my last entry. I had difficulty logging into my account, and apparently, I could not access my account. Until I got tired trying to get into it, and I tried to create a tumblr.

But blogger just makes me feel home. I haven't even been able to update my tumblr consistently.

Then I tried to log in again. Then voila, revived!

I'm really really really glad to be back! It just elates me! :)

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

This is the Story that I Have Always Wanted to Tell

Tonight, I have a story to tell.

I have been busy drawing lines on the manila paper as I write the program for our tasked concert. I hear the footsteps of the talents walking past behind me. Tik-tok-plok. Right to left, they go back to where they have come from. Left to right, they proceed to the stage area where they are expected to perform.

I write the letters, the words, the phrases: the scratches of the pentel pen screech a sharp, silent sound. They sing the notes, the melodies, the songs: sopranos, altos and bases form a soft, loud sound. The pen's complaint on his smooth tip's collision with the coarse surface of the paper seem to speak aloud, but the passionate singing of the performers overpowers his screeches. Tik-tok-plok. The performers continue to move from left to right, right to left. The show has just begun.

Tonight, I have a story to tell.

I have been busy writing letters on the manila paper for our sequence guide. The performers who have walked from left to right has probably reached the stage, starting to hum the melody of the night. The ambiance slowly transforms into a heavenly-feel. Hmmm... Hmmm.. Hmmm. Starting from a low note, their voices rise to a high note, going back again to a low. They have reached their destination, have begun their performance, and have now exhibited their voice's flexibility to the heeding and viewing public. I continue to write the letters, now with a heavenly feel.

Hmmm... Hmmm.. Hmmm. The melody transports me into a realm beyond what I see to be real - that we call memory. Imagination strikes harshly - sight flashing the past, hearing harkening the lost note, touch vibing the bygone. I continue to write - roman numerals, english words, commas, semi-colons. Periods. I write the last period. The singing of the performers stops, applause proceeds therein. The performers walk again - now from right to left. Accomplishing their performance, they go back to where they have come from.

Tonight, I have a story to tell.

Tik-tok-plok. I hear the thumps of their heels, soles and feet. From the notes that they have sung, memories spring forth. The table where I have laid down the manila paper seems to transform into a pond of illusions. I hear a familiar music, I see a familiar face, I hold a soft hand, I clutch to a firm arm. I respond to words of honesty, sincerity and wisdom. I wait for an additional hour. I dream. I believe.

Someone walked past behind me, humming a melody. Hmmm... Hmmm.. Hmmm.

I love. I fear.

Tik-tok-plok. Another one walks, now in the opposite direction. Another group of performers pace towards the stage. From left to right, they lead their own ways to their destination. The pond has returned to a table.

I love. I lose.

Tonight, I have a story to tell.

That stories simply repeat. But the endings - it can be changed. Depending on from where, to where you walk your way. Depending on the melody you choose to hum.
This is the story that I have always wanted to tell.

I have written this on December 3, 2009. It made me smile on three reasons:
  1. I vividly remember the feeling I had during this event. It was the UST Christmas Concert. I remembered celebrating the same event with someone during the previous year. He taught me a lot: thanks to him! Truly: Stories simply repeat. But the endings - they can be changed.
  2. I was amazed by the way I have written this entry - with consistent alliterations and spontaneity. I could attest: every word really came from the heart.
  3. I have learned enough. This is the story I would like to tell to myself.  

On another note:

Thank you to Dani for passing the Versatile Blogger Award to me! I really appreciate it. I hope to flood my blog with updates in the days to come!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Responding to Opportunities

Oftentimes, you doubt yourself. Whether or not you can achieve a dream, write a script, make a melody, inspire a crowd. When doubt casts on a hopeful heart, everything becomes impossible. You merely look at wishing stars and meteor showers. You don't count them; you are not amazed by them. You simply stare at them, and let time pass by.

You lose life, you lose love, you lose faith.

But when you think that time passes by regardless of doubt, your mind responds positively. Better get things done, and take enough risks. Remove the fear of speaking goodness. Simply speak, and the world will answer. Not everyone has the opportunity to write, dance, talk, sing. If something is given to you, that means you are the only one who can do it.

I repeat: you are the only one who can do it. 

That's what sets us apart. We are given our own roles. And you just better do it.

Because time passes, anyway. It's either you do something, you do it, or you do nothing.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Snapshots of Welcoming 2011

What: Catapusan Clan's 2011 Welcome Party
Where: Music Bank, Macapagal Ave., Pasay City
When: January 1, 2011
The Clan
Families unite!
The Streetfighters