2012 Wrap, Sort Of

I remember plunging into the seas of Dos Palmas for some snorkeling adventure. I did not want to let go of the rail I was holding onto. I had my life vest on, but I was afraid it won’t work. I was afraid to die. Little did I know, I would have my best life experience once I let go. And I did.

We have to loosen our grip from whatever keeps us intact and be ready to get broken and lost once in a while. We won’t see the beauty underwater if we remain floating on the surface. We have to be willing to let go of the rope, sail over deep seas, dive into the oceans, and paddle amid stormy waters to experience the best life can offer. There’s joy in our comfort zones, but there’s much of it outside – in our courage zones.

2012 has thrown me a lot – more than what I have imagined and asked for. From my work, to family, to so-called ‘romance’, service, and friendship. There were answered prayers, and there were also prayers that were answered even if I didn’t ask for it. There were many first times – a lot of them. I wouldn’t run out of first times every year, yet 2012 had given me a lot of must-have first times.

I weighed over 110 pounds, and gained a whooping 14 pounds in only three months. I weighed 117 in September - my heaviest ever.

Taken a week after my birthday. Clap clap for his milestone!

I had my first ever above-shoulders haircut. In June, barely a week before my birthday, I decided to get a bobcut – much like what Rihanna had when she rose into stardom haha. Here's why: a big chunk of my hair, especially on the tip portion, got burned when we had a birthday surprise for a friend. The giddy and excited me eagerly held the cake with a well-lit candle on top of it. After the surprise, we noticed something smelled weird, and blamed it first to the party-popper which didn’t pop. Until I saw my poor, burned, brown hair – in all its unglory. So I decided to get a cut.

My hair is growing pretty well now.

Color stories aside, I also had a haircut to begin anew. Having been from a failed relationship, it was good to shed off some strands and have new ones. As pop culture puts it, pagupit ka na, move on. Insert hastag-Basha with the line, “You had me at my best.”
Hahaha.

But I have to admit, this failed relationship has been amongst my greatest, biggest blessings (no stir, no bitterness, in all its sincerity) this year. It was when it happened that:

• I opened myself to service even more, and new doors for service opened before me (i.e. dance, Feast bulletin, CGs, etc.)
• I looked forward going to work, because I wanted to keep myself busy.
• I appreciated the love of my family and friends even more. In turn, life threw us plane tickets and travel times and we had our best travels yet.
• I felt the support of friends around me. Parang basketball league lang. I remember how one of them would usually say (insert LISSY name here haha!), "We’re on your side. Kakampi mo kami!" Like a war, just like that :P
• I gained new friends. Lifetime, true, sincere friendships (insert RUTHIE name here).

Joseph Prince once said God breaks our heart so he can penetrate our souls. He creates cracks so he can enter and cleanse our pains. Sometimes, unknowingly, we spend our time, effort, and treasure on things too much. We waste our time on ephemeral things. 

Or, maybe, we spend more than what we can on things which may last a lifetime. We overlook the fact that there are other important matters we have to attend to. We forget that we have a God whom we pray for our dreams, hopes, and aspirations. When God breaks our heart, he breaks our humanly desires, to bring back what’s divine, untouched, and pure in us. He doesn’t punish, rather, he teaches and comforts. He merely wants to shift our attention back to Him, fix our eyes on Jesus, and focus on the good. The things that we run after and look forward to must always be for the long term.

Riding the boat for the Underground River

Before snorkeling at Dos Palmas

My brother's smile over Pandan Island's heat and beauty

It was also this year our family had our first (yes, FIRST!!!) travel together. Amid Papa’s busy-ness, and mama’s homebuddy-ness, we managed to get out of Manila for a Subic getaway in January, and a Palawan weekend in May. I was beyond joyful spending precious time with my family, and having them, above all.

Papa underwent an operation in October (Is it? Can’t remember exactly what month). He had an open surgery for his gallstones. I was so fearful of losing him, although I know, it would just be a simple surgery, just like what my friend has gone through a month before him. It was when I realized how important family and loved ones truly are.

Mommy, my lola from the father’s side, also went back to our Creator, in His loving arms. Painful, yet we all know she’s now in the happily ever after of life.

I also learned business, got more interested in the financial world, and explored several sideline opportunities this year.

There have been pending answered prayers, which I claim this year. 2012, you were awesome. Saludo ako sa’yo. :)