Admitting Human Weakness

In a world that glorifies success, an admission of weakness disarms pride at the same time that it prepares us to receive grace. Meanwhile, the very weakness that drives us to pray becomes an invitation for God to respond with compassion and power.

- Philip Yancey

2013 Year of Gratitude Day 2

I am thankful I get to catch the priest's homily during a mass at the Greenbelt chapel, before heading to our meeting for my girlfriend's and Papa Mark's pre-nup. 

I am thankful for my first day of workday for 2013. 

I am thankful Mama, Jigs, and Aunti Linda arrived safe and sound in my Aunti's home in Cavite for fiesta celebration. 

Off to dreamland :)

Speaking of Peace on the New Year

We thank God for opening for us the door to peace. But we have the responsibility to enter that door. God's is the gift, ours is the mission of building peace. I share the dream of all Filipinos for peace and harmony in all aspects of our lives. We know, however, that peace can only be promoted by peacemakers, by people whose minds, consciences, attitudes and styles of life are devoid of self-interest. Peacemakers seek the common good. Peacemakers spread honesty, respect and friendship. I repeat the invitation of Pope Benedict XVI, "to say no to revenge, to recognize injustices, to accept apologies without looking for them, and finally to forgive.

A part of Manila Archbishop Luis Antonio Cardinal Tagle's New Year's message. From the Pope, to His arms of good men across the globe, to the clergy. The world speaks of peace nowadays.

Holidays for 2013

By virtue of Proclamation No. 459, workers can now look forward to their leaves with this year's scheduled holidays.

Regular Holidays
 * New Year's Day - January 1 (Tuesday)
 * Maundy Thursday - March 28
 * Good Friday - March 29
 * Araw ng Kagitingan - April 9 (Tuesday)
 * Labor Day - May 1 (Wednesday)
 * Independence Day - June 12 (Wednesday)
 * National Heroes Day - August 29 (Last Monday of August)
 * Bonifacio Day - November 30 (Saturday)
 * Christmas Day - December 25 (Wednesday)
 * Rizal Day - December 30 (Monday)

Special (Non-Working) Days
 * Black Saturday - March 30
 * Ninoy Aquino Day - August 21 (Wednesday)
 * All Saints Day - November 1 (Friday)
 * Additional special (non-working) days - November 2 (Saturday), December 24 (Tuesday)
 * Last day of the year - December 31 (Tuesday)

Special Holiday (for all schools)
 * EDSA Revolution anniversary - February 25 (Monday)

It doesn't apply to me, however. Just for everyone's information. Who knows, might be helpful to me as well. :)

New Beginning and Change

In the beginning were room cleaning and hearing the Holy Mass with my girlfriend. This was how I spent the first day of 2013. 

During the Mass, I thought of how I approached the start of a new year. This 2013 was different. I did not make a bucket list, bearing in mind I still had unchecked's in my 2012 - which I could use as my to-do's this year (or until I cross them all out). I didn't have a planner, which I used to consider a must-have in starting a year. Nevertheless, I had my goals set. It would include family, career, health, relationships. And OTL. I thought it would be enough for me to make it through this year. 

Somehow, I find it weird. I even feel a dint of fear in my heart, feeling my life's perspective has been changing. I am the usual meticulous, goal-setter-goal-getter. My life solely depends on my to-do's and goals. Without a planner and any organizer tools on hand, I feel I am loosening up and letting go of the steering wheel. It appears I am now depending my life on what others and the world would just offer me. I see, however, that this change in the way I approach life - and a new beginning, on that note - is a way of being spontaneous. On a literary, philosophical way of saying it, it is the "Embrace change." I am not fearful of change anymore. Well, fear still remains, yet I am now braver and bolder in facing both my fear of change and change itself. After all, nothing is permanent, other than change.

I look forward to this new beginning with excitement for surprises, first times, and abundance. 

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Last year, for the last half of November and the first half of December, I managed to complete my ''30 Days of Gratitude". I just find it cool to count your blessings everyday - as encouraged by one of the devotional-ish pages I liked on Facebook.

Having found both the purpose and perks of counting your blessings - and plainly being thankful even for the smallest things everyday - I thought of making another string of gratitude. This time, nonetheless, it won't be just 30 days. Why not make it 365 days? And so, here I have my 2013 Year of Gratitude. :)

Year of Gratitude Day 1

I heard the Good News with Ruthie tonight in a New Year Mass at the Greenbelt Chapel. The priest talked about the three Feasts the Catholic church is celebrating on the 1st day of January. These are New Year, Solemnity of Mary as the Mother of Jesus, and Peace day. 

He said attending the mass on the first day of the year is an act of greeting God. The way I see and interpret it, it's like saying, "Hi Jesus! It's me! I know you missed me! Super thank you for another year." It's seeing God and rubbing elbows with Him as you begin anew. 

On January 1st also falls the 8th day following Mama Mary's birth to Jesus. The priest explained, in the Jewish tradition, women are considered unclean for seven days after she has given birth to her son. It is only on the 8th day that she can be formally and officially recognized as the child's mother. He has not expounded why so, except that it was a Jewish way. Linking it to our daily life and struggles, Mama Mary can be our source of strength and hope when we feel lost, unaccepted and unclean. By her example.

January 1st is also a day of peace. I am thankful to be reminded of this, coming from years of conflict and grudge against one of my tito's, and a year of emotional turmoil with a close friend. 

God has forgiven me 7,007 times 7 times. Who am I not to do so?

By your grace, Jesus. Only by your grace.

Thank You, Difficult People

 

Even though I don't deserve Your love for me
You look beyond my fault and You showed mercy 

Like a morning cartoon show lullaby, this song has kept on repeating in my head throughout the day. 

While on my way to the office this morning, events of 2012 came rushing in. The rays of the sun crept through the windows and kissed my cheeks. It has been a peaceful morning: I was late, but the thought of going to work on a special non-working holiday was the best excuse to be OK to arrive late in the office. I wasn't in a hurry, not on a rush. Much like how I treated 2012 - specially the latter part of it.

I was expecting to do the usual weekday-work routine on the last day of the year. Writing for the noontime program in the morning, and 15-minuter updates in the afternoon. Same-same. Our anchor - who wasn't around for four days due to her no-voice illness - was present today. She asked some clarifications regarding one of the news I have written for a segment. I explained, and she suggested some ideas. I did as instructed, and it all turned out better and well.

I would like to thank her - and all the difficult people I have encountered this year. She has taught me a lot - from values, skills, work ethics, and attitude. She has been an epitome of who-I-don't-like-to-be to newbies in the industry when my career matures and brings me to greater heights. Career-wise, however, she taught me to be meticulous and aim for the best everyday.

I remember once, just about two weeks ago, she reminded us to be cautious of our writing and raise the bar. "Always try to be better everyday," she said. This girl has drawn all my good spirits and kindness in the past year; nonetheless, I had to admit, she has given me lessons I can bring throughout my industry life. 

I can now attest difficult people come into our life by no accident. They pass by, walk with us, and push us to our limits for a reason. 

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I'm pretty sure - well, I'm sure - I have been a difficult person to God, in many ways. I have been a consistent petitioner, but I fail Him many times when it comes to fulfilling my duties and service for Him. That is why it is no excuse not to forgive those who have wronged us and have brought us pain. If we're gonna sum up God's tears vis-a-vis ours, His would make up an ocean, whilst ours would fill a measly bottle of humanly pain. 

Thank you, Jesus. For your unfailing love. You are there when I am down and out. You're holding me, Your love is so amazing. Oh it changed me

2012 Wrap, Sort Of

I remember plunging into the seas of Dos Palmas for some snorkeling adventure. I did not want to let go of the rail I was holding onto. I had my life vest on, but I was afraid it won’t work. I was afraid to die. Little did I know, I would have my best life experience once I let go. And I did.

We have to loosen our grip from whatever keeps us intact and be ready to get broken and lost once in a while. We won’t see the beauty underwater if we remain floating on the surface. We have to be willing to let go of the rope, sail over deep seas, dive into the oceans, and paddle amid stormy waters to experience the best life can offer. There’s joy in our comfort zones, but there’s much of it outside – in our courage zones.

2012 has thrown me a lot – more than what I have imagined and asked for. From my work, to family, to so-called ‘romance’, service, and friendship. There were answered prayers, and there were also prayers that were answered even if I didn’t ask for it. There were many first times – a lot of them. I wouldn’t run out of first times every year, yet 2012 had given me a lot of must-have first times.

I weighed over 110 pounds, and gained a whooping 14 pounds in only three months. I weighed 117 in September - my heaviest ever.

Taken a week after my birthday. Clap clap for his milestone!

I had my first ever above-shoulders haircut. In June, barely a week before my birthday, I decided to get a bobcut – much like what Rihanna had when she rose into stardom haha. Here's why: a big chunk of my hair, especially on the tip portion, got burned when we had a birthday surprise for a friend. The giddy and excited me eagerly held the cake with a well-lit candle on top of it. After the surprise, we noticed something smelled weird, and blamed it first to the party-popper which didn’t pop. Until I saw my poor, burned, brown hair – in all its unglory. So I decided to get a cut.

My hair is growing pretty well now.

Color stories aside, I also had a haircut to begin anew. Having been from a failed relationship, it was good to shed off some strands and have new ones. As pop culture puts it, pagupit ka na, move on. Insert hastag-Basha with the line, “You had me at my best.”
Hahaha.

But I have to admit, this failed relationship has been amongst my greatest, biggest blessings (no stir, no bitterness, in all its sincerity) this year. It was when it happened that:

• I opened myself to service even more, and new doors for service opened before me (i.e. dance, Feast bulletin, CGs, etc.)
• I looked forward going to work, because I wanted to keep myself busy.
• I appreciated the love of my family and friends even more. In turn, life threw us plane tickets and travel times and we had our best travels yet.
• I felt the support of friends around me. Parang basketball league lang. I remember how one of them would usually say (insert LISSY name here haha!), "We’re on your side. Kakampi mo kami!" Like a war, just like that :P
• I gained new friends. Lifetime, true, sincere friendships (insert RUTHIE name here).

Joseph Prince once said God breaks our heart so he can penetrate our souls. He creates cracks so he can enter and cleanse our pains. Sometimes, unknowingly, we spend our time, effort, and treasure on things too much. We waste our time on ephemeral things. 

Or, maybe, we spend more than what we can on things which may last a lifetime. We overlook the fact that there are other important matters we have to attend to. We forget that we have a God whom we pray for our dreams, hopes, and aspirations. When God breaks our heart, he breaks our humanly desires, to bring back what’s divine, untouched, and pure in us. He doesn’t punish, rather, he teaches and comforts. He merely wants to shift our attention back to Him, fix our eyes on Jesus, and focus on the good. The things that we run after and look forward to must always be for the long term.

Riding the boat for the Underground River

Before snorkeling at Dos Palmas

My brother's smile over Pandan Island's heat and beauty

It was also this year our family had our first (yes, FIRST!!!) travel together. Amid Papa’s busy-ness, and mama’s homebuddy-ness, we managed to get out of Manila for a Subic getaway in January, and a Palawan weekend in May. I was beyond joyful spending precious time with my family, and having them, above all.

Papa underwent an operation in October (Is it? Can’t remember exactly what month). He had an open surgery for his gallstones. I was so fearful of losing him, although I know, it would just be a simple surgery, just like what my friend has gone through a month before him. It was when I realized how important family and loved ones truly are.

Mommy, my lola from the father’s side, also went back to our Creator, in His loving arms. Painful, yet we all know she’s now in the happily ever after of life.

I also learned business, got more interested in the financial world, and explored several sideline opportunities this year.

There have been pending answered prayers, which I claim this year. 2012, you were awesome. Saludo ako sa’yo. :)